“Due to high order volume, please allow up to 4-6 weeks for delivery,” says the new announcement for Donald Trump’s new God Bless the USA Bible.

High order volume? Already? The offer was just made today.

This Bible is, “Easy-to-read, large print and slim design.”

“This Bible invites you to explore God’s Word anywhere, any time,” the offer says … because other Bibles can’t be read anywhere and can only be read at certain times?

“This bible [sic] has been designed so that it delivers an easy reading experience in the trusted King James Version translation. This large print Bible will be perfect to take to church, a bible study, work, travel, etc.”

But wait. There’s more. If you order your $59.99 God Bless the USA Bible today, you also get:

* Handwritten chorus to “God Bless The USA” by Lee Greenwood
* The U.S. Constitution
* The Bill of Rights
* The Declaration of Independence
* The Pledge of Allegiance

And it’s all in stock now. But will take 4-6 weeks to get it to you. But its certainly worth waiting for. And if he sells just 2,917,153 Bibles at $59.99, it’ll cover this $175,000,000 bond that he has 10 days to pay.

— David Taffet