- Ryan Reed
In this week’s print edition you’ll find a full story on the lesbian couple from Bedford whose 4-year-old daughter was recently denied admission to a local preschool, St. Vincent’s Cathedral School, because she has two mommies. We also wanted to share the full text of responses to our questions that we received via e-mail from Ryan Reed, the dean of St. Vincent’s. Here they are:
DV: Why was Olivia Harrison denied admission to St. Vincent?
Dean Ryan Reed: When we met with Jill and learned of her family situation, we told her that the values taught at the school were in conflict with those at home. We thought this might put Olivia in a very conflicted situation to which Jill agreed. We don’t dispute God’s love for this family just that one of the basic Christian values that we subscribe to is sexual activity inside a faithful, lifelong relationship between a husband and wife. As best we could ascertain, this was not something that Jill was in agreement about.
DV: Why did the school fail to notice in more than two months that Jill Harrison had crossed out father and put mother on the application, and written in the name of her wife, Tracy Harrison?
Reed: When the admissions officer saw the changes on the application, she made 4 or 5 phone calls and sent at least one email asking for clarification, none of which were returned. We don’t have documentation of the phone calls but we do for the email.
DV: Why is the school continuing to use the name Episcopal even though it is no longer affiliated with the Episcopal Church USA?
Reed: This is obviously the confusing issue but far less emotional then having to say this family would not be a good fit. St. Vincent’s is part of the Episcopal Diocese of Fort, which is a corporation in the state of Texas run by a board of trustees. This diocese and this corporation voted to withdraw our voluntary association with the Episcopal Church USA and associate with a different province of the Anglican Communion (of which TEC is but one) but that did not change the fact that this is an Episcopal Diocese, governed by a Bishop using the Book of Common Prayer. This messy issue is what is at dispute in the Texas Court System right now. TEC does not own the term Episcopal. There is in this country the Charismatic Episcopal Church for example or in other places the Scottish Episcopal Church. In conversation, I refer to myself as an Anglican but until the lawsuit is settled we are still the Episcopal Diocese of Fort Worth, “province of the Southern Cone” (which is part of South America).
DV: Is it true that St. Vincent would allow Olivia Harrison to attend the school if she were a single, unmarried lesbian?
Reed: Yes. Our handbook asks our parents and requires our staff to abide by basic Christian values. That means abstinence or sexual activity confined to marriage. We have been consistent with this policy in that an unmarried teacher became pregnant and was dismissed. Likewise, we turned away two men with a daughter two years ago, and like the Harrison’s, referred them to a school where they would be more comfortable and their relationship accepted. (They are doing quite well there by the way). We have banned a husband from the school who left his wife for another women. The child stayed with the mother in this case and was not asked to leave.
We are simply asking people to strive toward the traditional Christian teaching in matters of how we live our lives. We don’t follow people around if they are single and dating to make sure the date stops at the front door. We don’t monitor what husband and wives are doing. But if something becomes public, we try to handle it in a pastoral and private way. By nature, Jill and Tracey’s relationship is very public.
We recognize that every parent who comes here is by nature prone to sin. We simply ask that they attempt to live by basic Christian values. In this case, the Harrison’s relationship was by nature in opposition to this belief and it is by nature a requirement that they cannot meet.
DV: How do you justify punishing a 4-year-old girl for who her parents are?
Reed: Back to the first answer. Because this young girl would likely hear Christian teaching on marriage at St. Vincent’s as well as the struggle that we all have with sin, she might be put in a place where she questioned not only the values of her mother but her moral authority as well. Olivia would certainly find herself in conflict with most of classmates when it comes to this very tough subject. We would not want this to happen to Jill, Tracey, or Olivia. It seems far from punishment to me, in fact, it seems more loving to refer them to a school that can accommodate their family situation rather than put her in a situation where the moral legitimacy (and still in Texas the legal legitimacy) of her mom’s relationship is called into question.
One final thought: I am not the pastor of the school parents which ties my hands a little. In the congregation, where I am pastor, we have a loving community of sinners who are all working through their walk with God. We have, and have had, gays and lesbians, both couples and singles. Without singling them out, they have been asked to wrestle alongside the rest of us with the fact that they are sinners in need of God’s forgiveness. Trying to conform our lives and our relationships with God’s will for us is done in a private and pastoral way.
Ryan Reed-Gaydar Reading = 11.
Dean Reed says, “We don’t dispute God’s love for this family just that one of the basic Christian values that we subscribe to is sexual activity inside a faithful, lifelong relationship between a husband and wife.”
While you and the other parents are certainly entitled to your personal opinion, please tell me where in the Bible Jesus Christ says that a faithful, life long relationship can only be between a husband and wife.
The closest reference I can find is, “I give you a new commandment. Love one another,” which obviously refers back to the woefully misquoted and mistranslated strictures from Leviticus, having to do with Jewish and non Jewish behaviors and mores.
I won’t even get in to the whole issue of divorce.
Meanwhile, please don’t misuse Jesus to justify homophobia. That would be called, “bearing false witness,” not to mention, “taking the name of God in vain.”
I thought Christian values were about inclusion, not exclusion. It’s also interesting to note that per Wikipedia, St. Vincent “was renowned for his compassion, humility and generosity.”
The sexual part is really none of your business, or that of the other parents, now is it? I would respectfully ask Dean Reed to stand up for what he indicates that he knows in his heart is right.
The school should be teaching tolerance and acceptance, not promoting misinformation. The little girl and her parents should be welcomed with open arms. Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.”
Thank you for an opportunity to respond. God bless us everyone!
If St. Vincent’s Cathedral School has non-profit or federally tax exempt status, it might to be revoked for this discriminatory decision. The decision is more than discrimination against the parents’ lifestyle, it’s worse, discriminating, as it does, against an innocent child for the lifestyle of her parents! I think the parents should discuss with a rights lawyer the possibility of suing on behalf of the child. If needed, seek the help of the American Civil Liberties Union. The suit might even be a precedent, and if fairly adjudicated, it could set a good and legally useful precedent.
They should perhaps sue not only the school, but Ryan Reed, personally, for his decision.
I know Dean Reed personally and have for almost 15 years. The only discrimination going on here is that he is going by Biblical doctrine. As for suing him, he is not the principal of the school, he is merely defending the decision of the school. And as for suing the school, it’s a private school which operates under stricter guidelines than most of the country clubs that many of you belong to. St. Vincent’s is a loving environment and had the Harrisson’s participated in full disclosure, this would have never made the news. I have to question their motive for going to the media with this after so long. It appears from the outside looking in, that they had a particular agenda in mind. There is no way I would ever put my child’s name in the paper on a subject such as this. You may think denying this child an education at this PRIVATE school a travesty, but the real travesty is the parents putting all of their business out there for everyone to see. If the Harrisson’s want to visit St. Vincent’s, they are more than welcome to sit with my family and pray about it. They’re not excluded from worship, nor is anyone else.