The big street party in Dallas was last Saturday, but truth is, Friday is officially Halloween … and some folks still have a party or two to go to. While we already ran a cover story on costume ideas, we thought we’d add these from our friend Mikey Rox, who suggests the gayest costumes you can still pull together in the next two days.
Early 20th century underbutler. You don’t have to blackmail your blue-blooded undercover lover to play the part of Thomas Barrow — the conniving gay underbutler on the sharp and soapy PBS period drama Downton Abbey — this Halloween. Dress to impress both nobles and peasants without dropping too much dough by assembling your post-Victorian-era attire from thrift shops and consignment finds. Pleated black trousers and a crisp band-collar button-down lay the foundation for this outfit that’s completed with a white bowtie, U-shaped satin vest and tuxedo tailcoat. Part your full head of hair on the side (or don a bowler) and puff on a fag (the British term for cigarette; not whatever you’re thinking) to fully embody the baddest bitch in Grantham House.
Dancing with the Stars contestant. Aaron Samuels (Cady Heron’s crush in the insta-gay-classic Mean Girls) played it straight at North Shore High School, but his real-life alter ego — sometimes actor Jonathan Bennett — has had the Internet abuzz about his sexuality since the film’s release in 2004. Now that J.B. and his twinkle toes are back in the spotlight on the couldn’t-be-gayer Dancing With the Stars, there’s no better time to pay homage to the guy who may or may not have (he’s not officially out) already broken a million girls’ (or boys’) hearts. To pull off this light-on-your-feet look, tango your way into a brightly colored button-down, an equally-loud-but-contrasting satin skinny tie, black slacks, black suspenders, and the snazziest tap shoes you can find. Because you never know when the rhythm is gonna get you.
Teen Wolf. It’s hard to put your finger on the queerest thing about MTV’s Teen Wolf: the quiver-inducing howls? the rampant homoeroticism? Colton Hayne’s Instagram profile? But that just makes pulling together pieces for this costume all the easier. You can go as protagonist Scott McCall (played by self-professed Gindr user Tyler Posey), or you might prefer sticking to your own kind as Danny Mahealani (Keahu Kahuanui), Beacon Hills High’s out-and-proud lacrosse player/computer whiz. Suit up in authentic lacrosse gear that you can find at a second-hand sports store (or by pilfering through your cousin’s super bro-y wardrobe) and work your makeup magic on a canine bite for the ages — which we know you wouldn’t mind getting legit if you lived in their world.
The cast of Looking. However you feel about HBO’s Looking, showing up at a party as the show’s cast is not only tres chic this Halloween, it’s also perfect for a coordinated group costume. You’ll have to pull up past episodes (which you can watch on demand) to get a better idea of each character’s personal style, but you’ll likely discover that you can recreate their looks from your own wardrobe. Tack on a commitment issue or two and throw in a penchant for threesomes for posterity’s sake, and you’ve got the looks down pat. Do us all a favor though, won’t you? Post photos of your group’s Russell Tovey; the world needs more of that going around.
Dallas Cowboys fan. Given the staggering amount of negative publicity that the NFL has received this season (thanks to woman beaters, child abusers and drunken drivers), it should consider itself lucky that the gays are finally getting in on the game. And it seems that no team is embracing its friendly neighborhood homosexual makeover more than the Dallas Cowboys. First there’s the addition of defensive end Michael Sam to the roster (even though they eventually cut him), but there’s also a new DirecTV Sunday Football commercial depicting a gay couple — one of whom is a Cowboys fan — that has largely flown under the radar. Give the latter the relevance it deserves this All Hallow’s Eve by pulling together whatever Dallas gear you can find (and convincing your boo to sport a Giants jersey) while trying your best to avoid a brush with the law. A night in the slammer only sounds good in theory.
Hedwig. The East German transgender singer with an “angry inch” between her legs experienced somewhat of a renaissance this year as actors Neil Patrick Harris, Andrew Rannells and Michael C. Hall all stepped into the punk-rock role on Broadway. And now you too can milk John Cameron Mitchell’s cash cow for your own benefit by raiding your wacky Aunt Barb’s closet for late ’70s/early ’80s-inspired fashion, BeDazzling a pair of cutoff Daisy-Duke-style denim, and rockin’ a sick ‘Hed’-wig that you can score on Etsy.
Lovechild of Jared Leto and Justin Theroux. There’s been a sizeable amount of buzz about what’s beneath Jared Leto and Justin Theroux’s respective boxers lately — and nobody’s complaining. Justin gave us full-frontal floppage in a few jogging scenes on his very violent and ultra-strange HBO drama The Leftovers, while the ghost of Jordan Catalano will not be satisfied until he’s officially crowned Biggest Cock in Hollywood. And for this, they both should be celebrated. To imitate these forces of nature yourself, mash-up the pair’s signature styles (Justin’s into leather; Jared is a little more “la boheme”) and stuff a swingin’ Richard down your crotch. Even better if you’ve got the natural goods so you don’t disappoint the evening’s potential paramour(s).
