You pledge that allegiance, girlfriend!

It was reported Monday that there is new evidence to suggest that Betsy Ross’ design for the American flag comes from a shirt she made for her gay friend Nathaniel. Who knew? The article says:

“It’s amazing to think that Nathaniel unknowingly designed the most iconic flag in world history,” said Historical Society of Pennsylvania researcher Maxwell Derosiers, who found the journal in the pocket of a period cheetah-print waistcoat in the organization’s basement. “From the American flags that flew over Fort McHenry and Iwo Jima, to the one planted on the surface of the moon, every incarnation of the Stars and Stripes traces its roots to this one very gay article of clothing”

“And I mean really gay,” Derosiers added. “This was a sleeveless crop top.”

This new development was hilariously reported by The Onion.