The Rev. Bill McElvaney will soon marry longtime couple Jack Evans and George Harris, despite facing consequences from the church
TWO OF A KIND | The Rev. Bill McElvaney, Northaven United Methodist Church’s emeritus pastor, right, plans to officiate at same-sex weddings. And Eric Folkerth, Northaven’s current pastor, said he will likely do so in the future as well. (Anna Waugh/Dallas Voice)
At first glance, retired Methodist pastor the Rev. Bill McElvaney appears to be a soft-spoken, genial man of faith.
But at 85, McElvaney has had enough with the United Methodist Church’s anti-gay teachings, so he decided to speak out about the injustices the church teaches with a declaration from Northaven’s United Methodist Church’s pulpit Sunday.
McElvaney, Northaven’s emeritus pastor, stood before the congregation and told them he “would consider it a privilege to officiate at a same-sex wedding.”
“To be a friend is to become an advocate, one who by word and deed translates heartbreak into pastoral and prophetic action,” he said during the sermon.
The announcement earned him a five-minute standing ovation. But the act is against the church’s beliefs, which considers homosexuality “incompatible with Christian teaching.” Pastors who have defied the church have faced severe consequences. In December, Pennsylvania Methodist pastor the Rev. Frank Schaefer was defrocked for presiding over his gay son’s Massachusetts wedding.
WEDDING BELLS | George Harris, left, and Jack Evans, who celebrated their 53rd anniversary Sunday, have attended Northaven for 20 years. They plan to have McElvaney marry them as soon as possible.
Northaven has a long history of supporting LGBT equality. In the late ‘80s, the church began welcoming LGBT people and became the first local reconciling church in the 90s. Now there are four reconciling churches in the area.
McElvaney, who grew up attending Highland Park Methodist Church, was baptized in the church, ordained by the church and is well aware of the action the church could take against him. The church could convene a trial and defrock him when he performs a same-sex wedding — but he doesn’t care at this point in his life.
“All of those vulnerabilities kind of pale to standing in solidarity with our GLBT friends,” he said.
Many LGBT couples he’s known in the church and throughout his life have impacted him to take a stance on same-sex marriage.
“They have taught me a lot,” he said, adding that he took a public stand when the time was right for him. “You have to grow into a position over time and have the Holy Spirit guide you to take a position.”
One of the LGBT couples at Northaven who inspired McElvaney are Jack Evans and George Harris, who heard his announcement on their 53rd anniversary. They’ve been active in the church for 20 years and were called on stage and recognized Sunday as a longtime couple.
Evans said they’ve seriously discussed going and getting married in another state but have wanted to wait to legally wed in Texas.
“I don’t know if we’ll live that long,” Evans said.
Although the marriage performed by McElvaney wouldn’t be legal in Texas, the couple said they’ve decided to have him marry them. They’re just waiting on logistics.
“We’re waiting to hear from the pastor and Rev. Bill about when it could take place,” Evans said. “It’s possible that something will come very quickly.”
The service won’t take place at Northaven. Eric Folkerth, the current pastor, said he’s not ready to break the church’s rules yet by performing same-sex weddings himself or allowing them to take place in the church. However, he’s worked with two area churches close to Northaven, Midway Hills Christian Church and Central Congregation Church, that have agreed to host his congregation’s services.
Folkerth said same-sex marriage is the “most gut-wrenching decision about my ministry.” A recent survey of the church discovered that 14 couples had been married outside the state, with seven of those taking place in the past year.
“That tells me something as a pastor,” he said. “Same-sex marriage is becoming an issue in this church that we need to pay attention to as a pastoral issue and as a justice issue.”
Jim Lovell and Bill Stoner are one of the 14 couples who’ve already married. They made a day trip in August 2010 to Iowa to make their union legal.
They attended Northaven several years ago before moving to France. But they come back once a year to visit friends and attend church. They happened to pick the Sunday when McElvaney made his announcement.
“We didn’t know there was a big announcement until we were at church,” Lovell said.
Stoner said it caught them by surprise.
“I literally gasped, and I think the reason I gasped was to keep from crying,” Stoner said.
Having known McElvaney for years, though, Stoner said they know the work he’s done for social justice and are proud he made a bold statement.
“He’s been fighting for a lot of people that he’ll never meet,” Stoner said. “With this announcement, for him to come out at this point in his life in his 80s and face possible charges by the church, we just admire this man so completely for what he’s done.”
In the future, Folkerth said he’d “very likely at some point” be willing to officiate a same-sex union in his church, but he doesn’t want to face the consequences of doing so at this time.
“Right now it’s a choice between my GLBT family and my own family,” he said. “There will come a time when I will, but now is not that time.”
Evans and Harris support Folkerth’s decision and are glad to have the option of being married by someone in the Northaven family.
“We would certainly love for it to have been in the church, in our own church, and our own pastor, but that’s not a possibility,” Evans said. “He’s not in a position to do it at all. We welcome the opportunity to be married by [McElvaney]. [Folkerth] has too much to lose. We would not encourage him at all.”
Both McElvaney and Folkerth think the Methodist Church will be forced to accept LGBT clergy and perform same-sex weddings as more and more Methodist leaders take stands for equality.
“This issue needs to be addressed,” McElvaney said. “The American United Methodist Church needs to get a grip. They’re so behind the times it’s pathetic.”
Folkerth said the response from the Northaven congregation has been 100 percent positive, further proof of how far attitudes have come.
“I think that tells us something,” he said. “I think people are very ready for this church to move forward on this and understand why we need to.”
The earliest a vote to change the church’s stance on homosexuality in the Book of Discipline is the General Conference in 2016. Folkerth said the majority of American Methodists would vote to change the views, but the international Methodist community would prevent the church from moving forward.
In the meantime, Folkerth said he wishes the church would change how it handles rule breakers, like McElvaney will soon be, and not defrock them for a social stance.
“There’s no way the church can bring all these people to trial,” McElvaney added. “We can’t go on this way without extensive bleeding on all sides.”
And while McElvaney is appreciative of what the Methodist Church has given him in the four decades he’s preached and taught seminary classes, he said he can’t continue to follow its outdated teachings blindly instead of doing what he feels is right.
“I owe the Methodist church a lot, but what I do not owe the Methodist Church is my soul,” he said.
This article appeared in the Dallas Voice print edition January 24, 2014.
