On being grand marshal and the power of Pride
Happy Pride month y’all! This has been such an interesting Pride. First off, I got to be one of the grand marshalls of the Pride parade this year, and it was awesome. I was actually asked to be grand marshall last year in 2021, but because of freakin’ COVID it was more of a symbolic thing.
This year, I got to sit in the back of a convertible with my name on the side of the car, just like I had always imagined it in my head.
As most of you know, I only have one shade of drag — ON! I don’t do half drag or a light mug. I am either all of the way in drag or not in drag at all. Parade day, I was in full, hardcore drag — big hair, fully padded, corseted and with a completely beat mug. I was grand marshall, so I had to look good.
Just FYI, it is June in Texas, and so of course it was hot as balls. Luckily, we got a little bit of a breeze every once in a while. But I actually handled the heat so much better than I thought I would. I am a complete wimp when it comes to the heat, so the fact that I didn’t die was a win for me.
And once the parade actually started to move, it was easy to forget about how hot I was.
I remember back to my very first Pride parade — I think I was 19 — and meeting Valerie Lohr for the first time. She was riding in the parade as the reigning Miss Gay America. When I saw her, she was sitting in a convertible waiting for the parade to start. She was lucky that her car was sitting in the shade of the tollway bridge on Wycliff. The guy I was dating at the time loved drag and knew just about everyone, so he made sure we stopped and talked to Valerie. Then later, at the end of the parade, I got to see Valerie perform at the park.
She was flawless.
That was my first taste of real Pride and what it could mean for a young gay that always felt like he was the only gay kid in the world.
Seeing hundreds of us all together was one of the best moments in my life. So I did not take for granted the power of being in the Pride parade; I got to be someone’s great memory of their first Pride.
I tried to make eye contact with as many young people as possible. I would complement them on their rainbow clothing or their hair they had dyed just for the parade. The way their faces would light up when they felt seen was so cool.
Probably the best part of the day for me was seeing so many little kids waving and yelling “Happy Pride” to us. I teared up just about every time I saw that. It was just so normal to them, and the amount of love that just beamed from them was incredible.
Thank you to all of the parents that brought their kids out that day. Your kids will grow up to be so much more accepting than most. I applaud you.
Being one of the grand marshalls was probably the biggest ego boost of my life. I’ve been in the parade before but always on a float with other drag queens. People scream and cheer for us as we ride by, waving like there is no tomorrow, and it always feels so good.
But that ride as grand marshal — that was so special to me.
Hearing people on both sides of the parade route yelling my name was such a moment for me. Then at one point they literally started to chant: “Cassie Nova! Cassie Nova!” They were clacking fans and making the most amazing sound.
I got such a lump in my throat.
That was such an incredible moment for me to experience. I have never felt so special.
The other thing that made that day so special to me was that I got to share it with my husband and one of my best friends. Jamie drove, and Ross kept my toes from cramping by pulling my tights. Best Pride ever!
Now, this next bit of bullshit is exactly why we need Pride.
So, I was very close to my best friend’s family growing up. From 5th grade through high school graduation, I was at their house more than I was at my own. But after we graduated and I came out, we grew apart. We reconnected about 10 years ago, and we’ve had dinner a few times. But we have all changed so much, I just didn’t feel I had a place in their conservative Christian life. No big deal — I have an amazing chosen family.
Let me be clear about one thing, I will always love that family and the way they loved me when I was a kid.
But my childhood best friend — let’s call him Ike — is now a vocal Republican and a conservative Christian. Ike has lots of opinions on lots of things. Most of them are about things that do not affect him or his life in any way. Over the years I have heard, “Love the sinner not the sin,” along with various Bible quotes and transphobic jokes and, most recently, “GOD HATES PRIDE!”
Okay Ike, calm your tits. I am so sick of religion being forced on me. Mostly I am sick of religion being used against me. I am so sick of it. I do not believe what you believe. I mean, one day “God is Love” and the next God hates! Which is it?
If you are trying to recruit us, you are doing a shitty job of it. You and your kind are driving us further away. I refuse to believe in a God that hates us learning to love and accept ourselves.
So, this Pride month, love yourself a little bit more. You are awesome, and always remember that the thing that makes you different is the thing that makes you special. Embrace it. Turn the volume on that anti-US bullshit way down and blare that Pride till your speakers blow!
Remember to always love more, bitch less and be fucking fabulous! XOXO, Cassie Nova
