Admit it: You watch The Real Housewives because you see yourself in those characters. Are you kept by a “big papa” like Kim? A crazy, in-your-face bitch like NeNe? A big-haired, table-up-ending psycho like Teresa? Or maybe you crashed a White House party. Only you could do it better and be fabulous at the same time. And with more product in your hair.

Well, now’s your chance.
As Logo’s The A-List: New York winds down its popular inaugural season, the company that produces it is expanding its franchise a la the Housewives. That means new cities, and first among them: Dallas. (Los Angeles is also casting.)
If you want to be the new Reichen (although, let’s face it: You’re probably more an Austin), you can go to TheAListCasting.com and fill out a questionnaire. Casting agents will then be in town from Dec. 6 through 23 doing on-site interviews to find the gays they want to follow for a few months.
Here are some of the questions you get to answer (and some suggested responses guaranteed to get you noticed):
• “Have you ever been arrested?” (Answer: It’s not that I was arrested — it’s what I did for the arresting officer in the squad car that got my record cleared) …
• “What does your significant other do for a living?” (Trust me: Being my significant other is a full-time job) …
• “Are you sexually active?” (No, I just lie there) …
• “Are you trying to have children!” (Yes! I’ve been fucking my boyfriend daily for a year but he’s still not pregnant … too bad I went to public school in Texas and didn’t get decent sex ed) …
• “Why do you think you are A-List?” (I’m self-absorbed and shallow, and gossip constantly about others while failing to see those same traits in myself … Why? What have you heard?)
We have a weiner! See ya on TV!