No Pride parade is complete with a line-up of sexy cars carrying rainbow royalty
CASEY WILLIAMS | Auto Reviewer
AutoCasey@AOL.com
Pride Parades are a celebration of freedom, highlighted by frisky fun, skimpy outfits and sexy cars. Here are five of the sexiest cars that can help make your parade a dream.
1976 Cadillac Eldorado
It’s difficult to discern whether this Queen Mary is an ocean liner, parade float or just about the biggest, plushest Cadillac ever to ply America’s motorways. One thing’s for sure: She looks better than a Macy’s balloon as she peacocks and rocks down the boulevard with an orgy of boys piled inside.
Its 8.2-liter V8 produces just 218 horsepower, but a self-leveling rear suspension keeps its chrome bumpers from dragging. The Bicentennial Edition — with white paint and dual red-and-blue pinstripes — is especially festive.
Fans partied hard in 1976, because this Eldo was billed as the last American convertible. But alas, the party eventually continued with droptops dropping their tops.
2024 GMC Hummer EV Pickup
“Sun’s out, guns out” applies to this jumbo-sized, go-anywhere, open-air pickup with the electric brawn to accentuate its physical “beauty.” Removable transparent “Sky Panels” toss to the bed for Pride events, and it can tow 12,000 pounds of parade float.
Check its digits: 1,000 horsepower, 381-mile range, 0-60 mph in 3 seconds. Fast charge 100 miles in 12 minutes. Rear-wheel steering allows the big truck to crabwalk to curbs and turn on tight city streets.
Video game maker Epic Games developed the 13.4-inch center touchscreen and digital gauge cluster. You can even cruise hands-off on the way to the celebration. But you may need to be revived when you spy the $96,550 base window sticker.
1961 Lincoln Continental Convertible
The car most famous for carrying President Kennedy during his last parade has become a style icon perfect for carrying a cadre of cowboys or a pride of princesses though its center-opening doors.
Compared to the high-finned drama queens from Cadillac at the time, the debonair Continental was dressed for a new decade. Sharp fenders and flat decks cut a swath through candy, balloons and crowds of partiers while providing wide expanses on which to be seen.
The twin-cowl dash, wood veneers and supple leather sofas treat passengers like prom royalty. And, if you have to get away in a hurry, the 300 horsepower 7.0-liter V8 and competent handling whisk you on your way.
2019 Volkswagen Beetle Final Edition
Volkswagen has long stood for standing outside social norms, and it has been recognized for its open acceptance of the LGBTQ community. And does any car represent Volkswagen better than a Beetle Cabrio? I mean, every parade needs its clown, so might as well take off your top, too.
Exhibiting both pageantry and panache, the Final Edition 2019 Beetle Convertible — wearing blue paint, blue cotton top and beige interior accents — was born parade-ready. All Beetles pave their own path, but this one is especially cool, powered by a 2.0-litre turbo-four engine that delivers 174 horsepower and 26/33 MPG city/highway. She’s a keeper.
Any-year Chevrolet Corvette
Pick a Corvette. Any Corvette from throughout its 71-year history. Whether it’s Dallas Pride or the high school homecoming parade in Anytown, U.S.A., there will be Corvettes.
From the moment it debuted at the Waldorf Astoria for 1953 wearing Polo White paint, Sportsman Red interior and powered by its Blue Flame Six engine, it was a marketing dream. It’s long, curved … nose, wide, accentuated … fenders and deep, pulsing … interior are super sexy, whether it’s a 1963 Stingray or 2024 E-Ray hybrid.
Cheerleaders, no matter their orientation, ride high when the top is stowed, and their cheeks are planted on the rear deck as they wave at crowds and toss candy to the wind.
And after the festivities, this red-blooded American supercar will be ready to get busy.
Storm Forward!