TAMMYE NASH | Senior Editor
nash@dallasvoice.com
R Family Vacations was born out of its co-founder’s desire to give her children — and the children of other same-sex couples — at least that one week out of the year when their families were the “norm.”
When Kelli Carpenter and Gregg Kaminsky founded the company in 2003, their primary focus was to provide a place where LGBT couples and families could enjoy a vacation experience with other families like their own. Carpenter and her former partner, Rosie O’Donnell, have four children themselves.
“Ro and I were searching for a place where our own children wouldn’t feel so alone,” says Carpenter, who was in Dallas recently to promote R Family’s 2011 line-up of vacation events.
“It’s hard to describe the feeling on one of our vacations,” she says. “I usually just leave it to the people who have been on one of our trips, and what they usually say: It is a sense of community, of, for once, being with other families like yours, that the children really look forward to. There is so much laughter and such a sense of joy and camaraderie that you can’t find anyplace else.”
“A lot of the families that come on board an R Family cruise live in the middle of Idaho or somewhere like that where there are no other families like theirs anywhere around. And their tears and their joy are so intense because this is the one place where they can actually feel that sense of family, that sense of knowing there are other families like theirs out there.”
All-women cruises for lesbians and all-men cruises for gay men were already common when R Family came about. But Carpenter and O’Donnell felt “That’s not what [our] life looks like. Our community has changed. If you are a woman, and you have two sons and you want to go on vacation with your best friend who is a gay man, an all-woman cruise or an all-guy cruise isn’t the place for that.”
And the community has changed even more since the first R Family cruise in 2004. Now R Family clients aren’t just same-sex couples with their children. More and more often, couples are bringing their straight parents and siblings along, as well as their chosen families. Even same-sex couples without children are opting for R Family vacations to take advantage of the family-friendly atmosphere where their straight family members will feel comfortable and welcome, too, Carpenter says.
That change, coupled with the recession that curtailed many people’s vacation plans, has prompted R Family to find ways to reach out to new clients.
“There were a lot of businesses that were really hard hit by the recession. Considering that we are a luxury product, I think we downsized at just the right time and in just the right way,” Carpenter says. “We had built up to two cruises a year, and then, as the economy started to go down, we went back to just one full ship a year. We were starting to run out of itineraries, and we were getting a lot of requests for something different.”
Last year, R Family offered something different: Instead of a cruise ship completely for R Family vacationers, the group started offering group trips on larger, mainstream cruises. Carpenter said while she had some reservations at first about taking a group of LGBT families on a cruise with mainstream families, her fears were soon laid to rest.
“I went in emotionally prepared for some issue to crop up, and there was none. It was kind of nice for our families to have each other to rely on and at the same time, to be able to look at the other families and realize that underneath it all, we looked just like everyone else on the boat,” she says.
Also last year, for the first time, R Family offered something other than a cruise: A week for LGBT families at Club Med in Ixtapa.
“The Club Med week was a tremendous success, and not just for our regular cruisers who wanted something different for a change,” Carpenter says. “This year, we are offering a week at Club Med Sandpiper in Florida, and I think it will be even more successful.”
Despite brighter prospects for the economy, many families are still cutting back on luxury expenses like vacations. Even though last year’s Club Med trip was less expensive than a cruise, it still required travel abroad, and airfare isn’t cheap.
That’s why Carpenter expects the “Summer Camp” Club Med Sandpiper week, July 9–16, to be even more popular. Families can make the trip by car rather than having to fly.
“The Club Med resorts always offer plenty of activities, but for the R Family weeks, we completely start over as far as entertainment and programming. We will have top-notch comedians and theatrical performances for the grown-ups. Every night there will be a different, unique performance. The company will also offer its first adult-only vacation this year, in response to the growing number of requests for something a little more adventurous from gay men and lesbians who want to vacation together.”
The week-long adults-only package aboard the Norwegian Epic sails from Miami to the Western Caribbean March 5. Other packages include a family vacation aboard the Norwegian Jewel Feb. 20, and the R Family cruise returns with a trip aboard the Norwegian Jade from Venice to four Greek islands departing Aug. 6.
“We are glad that we are able to offer all these options, and to do it in a way that doesn’t put the company at risk,” Carpenter says. “There are a lot of families with children that really count on these vacations every year. It’s a chance for these kids to see that they are not alone, a chance to get to see their parents be together and express affection for each other in public, and to have a safe environment to do that in.
“I think our company and the growth of our company is reflective of what I wish the whole world looked like — someplace the entire family can be themselves and be comfortable being themselves.
For more information, visit FamilyVacations.com.
This article appeared in the Dallas Voice print edition Feb. 4, 2011.
I wouldn’t go on one of these trips unless Ms, Carpenter wasn’t going to be there. i met her at a restaurant in Ny city (or tried to) and tried to introduce myself and she was rude, arrogant and wanted nothing to do with someone who simply wanted to say hello.
I believe we are all equal and was taught to treat people as such.
She has this ‘ALMIGHTY” attitude, which I find repulsive.
Greg on the other hand has a smile of an angel and I have met him and he was very, very kind, both he and his husband.
Let people say what they will about Roise O……but I am surprised she could have lived with such an arrogant BITCH as long as she did! I am so happy Ro has found a “real” as in genuine woman, who is not after her money, but loves her…period.
Much luck to Kelli……she will need it…KARMA IS A BITCH! AND SO IS SHE!
Dear Jonathan,
Everyone is entitled to have a bad day! I am sorry that your experience of Kelly was not a positive one in your eyes. I have met Kelly numerous times and have spent two weeks with her on separate cruises. I can assure you she is not the person you describe above. She is actually a very kind, compassionate, and caring person! All I can say is that you must have caught her on a bad day. You ought to not sit in judgement of others unless you are ready to have others sit in judgement of you! Here’s hoping that your bad days don’t leave the same impression on the one’s who encounter you!
I have to say that Kellie’s son with Rosie, PARKER is a really polite young man and his mannerisms show that Kellie kept him very grounded. If I was not a “slave” at the time, from damages of Entertainers in another state that I was close friends and colleagues, I would not write here. I know how bad “arrogant egos can be in that industry” as I worked in it. I as well was bullied as “gay slurs” too and know that Kellie has to be a strong lady to be in a successful LGBT career and to have a mainstream family relationship. She never had humiliation in the media, slander in the media and blacklisting and has never been humiliated to have to be a “house slave” to just get to NY to get away from the damages. I can tell you I would never wish to meet her or anyone unless I was in a good spiritual space in my own career successes and creative successes as NOW I finally have with partners in production and artistic areas too. I would say to the person that called Kellie a “B” word to think again, as YOU try to be stuck in the limelight of trashy MEDIA and have to be followed around when you want privacy. She is human and with kids and I have cared for HER kid and my own and many many others all ages and teach them yoga to art and music and I will tell you she has a RIGHT to just be alone sometimes…privacy rocks.
ps…Kellie is also lucky to have LGBT friends…I have had only backstabbers in it. I have left the “scene” when at one time I co produced events up to 100k guests for 2 days and concerts to vegan gourmet and fun retreats. I have had to be stuck in a 100% boring world of ego maniac yoga people that really let me know how isolating NY can be. I wish I had a friend like Kellie as I heard she was a sweetie pie and cute too. So anyone that puts her down is trash.
I do note that the healing our planet needs for Japan is also to learn that at any moment we could lose all including family, friends and colleagues and if we only CARED to mentor and befriend and be kinder everyday and also understand stressors like kids, then possibly the globe would care to be kinder. I had to actually make dinners and clean houses for Kellie’s KID and OTHERS in Rockland County living with an arrogant mean roommate that believed that “pills for kids and preservative foods were the key to life”. He also treated me like a Haitian slave and thank God I can handle bullying enough in careers to still pay my rent. I will never ever meet Kellie and tell her who I lived with but he is not as NICE as she thinks he is…