In response to comments on the post below about Mark Reed canceling Blake Wilkinson’s plane ticket, “Andrew” is proposing a summit of local LGBT activists — “a conversation for possibility” — to explore ideas for achieving full equality. In an e-mail sent to myself and Senior Editor Tammye Nash, Andrew argues that the LGBT communiity lacks any comprehensive, finite plan for achieving our ultimate goal. In the same comments thread, Queer LiberAction’s Rick Vanderslice previously proposed a rendezvous on Tuesday night at his pad, but Andrew has made a counterproposal: Thursday from 7-9 p.m. at La Madeleine on Lemmon Avenue, where he says he’s booked a private room. Alas, I’ll be on a flight to D.C. for the National Equality March at that time, so please fill me in on the game plan later. Personally, I think we should consider the wildcat formation. But seriously, you can read Andrew’s full e-mail after the jump.
Tammye/John:
I have enjoyed reading commenting on your site. I believe it is both entertaining and helpful for the community.
I am writing this email because of some recent exchanges on the Mark Reed – Blake/QL Story. The question was asked “does any LGBTQ Group have a ‘plan’ for our full Equality? It seemed the consensus was a reluctant “no.” This is a problem.
I understand that the gay community doesn’t really have a leader (sorry Cleve) and of the hundreds of different groups, none seems to be about our “full equality.” Each group is working in a particular area, hoping to achieve something to add to the equation. But, it’s all very incremental and doesn’t inspire many people in our community. HRC just lobbies politicians and they have had minimal results (after 28 years). Legal groups produce results that simply swing back and forth, win one, lose one. GLAAD polices public comments. Marches ….. well, I can’t think of anything.
Statewide efforts center on winning a particular battle. Local efforts help with HIV and AIDS. Brad Pitt utters something helpful every once in a while. Larry Kramer wakes from a nap and scolds us again (perhaps right on target). Obama promises and Barney babbles. It’s just a whole bunch of gay “noise” and no measurable results. Direct action, inaction and no traction.
What becomes very clear is that even after 40-50 years of being somewhat organized – we don’t have a “strategy” to win. No plans. In fact, none of the hired guns will even make a “projection” about when we might obtain our equality. Because of this, we can never win. We have no way of deciding where and when to even provide our resources and no exciting (feasible) strategy to inspire the community. It’s so bad we actually herald Will & Grace as an accomplishment.
I would like to invite DFW area activists and advocates to a Meeting next Thursday from 7-9 pm at La Madeleine on Lemmon Avenue. The purpose of the meeting is too explore ideas for full equality for the LGBT Community. This will be a “conversation for possibility.”
I believe there are some very passionate, creative and crafty individuals within our Community that are willing to help create a solution. Maybe they just need an invitation or challenge. We need to come together and all work towards the same goal: full equality, nothing less.
Everyone is welcome to attend.
Looking forward,
Andrew
This is great and all. But seriously, you shouldn’t show up for a date with a guy whose last name you don’t even know.
BTW, there is real news going on today…
https://www.dallasnews.com/sharedcontent/dws/news/localnews/stories/100109dnmetgaymarriage.1d5a0d50d.html
Brandon – your “date” is with is with “equality.”
Count me in. I agree, it’s important to come up with a plan. It’s been 30 years in the fight and I don’t think we’ve made as much progress as I/we had hoped.
I’m there. Been waiting for this conversation for a long long time.
I would like to play the role of Madeline Albright, if possible.
This will be great before I head to the March on Friday. I agree, we need a plan the Community can embrace. Let’s talk.
Blake and I will be happy to attend. Lets hear from everyone in this thread and the Reed one to start posting with their acceptance to join all of us.
rick vanderslice
I’ll be in Austin celebrating LGBT equality at another historic event called The Cotillion (https://2009.fireandink.org), but Brandon has a point: Andrew who? Picture? Association? I mean at least we know (or at least know of) Rick Vanderslice.
Yeah, Michael Vick needs the “Al Gore Internet Award” for that one…
Shouldn’t the event be moved up from Thursday night, as most local activists would already be enroute or packing for the Washington, DC events?
Unfortunately, I will be unable to attend because of work commitments, however would enjoy being included in any future meetings.
I will be on my way to DC for the March, but please include me in future meetings as well!
As long as it’s a “conversation” and not a cage match, I’ll be there 🙂
Well gee, funny how the original intent and purpose of this little gathering quickly turned from a group of commentors getting together who were in disagreement and concerned about issues, to a full blown gay political “activists” coalition complete with a “game plan” strategy and media coverage……………..What’s next, corporate and political “sponsorship”.
Amazing how in Dallas, a simple proposal can get completely distorted and reshaped into some political endeavor even though that wasn’t the original proposal’s intent……
A classic example of how politics and corporate strategies are brainwashed into our GLBT culture…..
Good luck “activists”. Seeing that this meeting has taken a drastic departure from its original purpose, I no longer have a desire to attend.
@GLBT I assumed that this was a meeting of the minds so that we can produce a strategy. I also thought it was a challenge to people who seem to bitch all the time and really have no “plan” for obtaining full equality to place their ideas on the table in order to produce a plan. Am I wrong to think that? What did you expect from this meeting?
I have heard from a number of people who will be unable to attend Thursday, so I have changed the meeting to:
Wednesday, October 7th from 7-9 PM at the Warwick Melrose Hotel. We have a meeting room and there will be refreshments. There will also be ideas, suggestions and plans – bring yours.
This Meeting is about creating a winning strategy and working together. Media can attend, but the meeting is “off the record.” It is important that everyone can speak freely and we can effectively compare “ideas,” not personalities, past histories or private grudges. This is about WINNING equality and we all have something to contribute.
Equal means equal. When anyone decides to get lost in the non-productive world of “fair and compare” we are no longer equal. I am a gay white man and I will never stand in judgement of anyone’s effort – I don’t have the time for that because it is not productive. I will accept nothing less than full equality for all LGBT persons and I’m not interested in the color or status of anyone who helps us get there. The photo at the Finish Line is less important than actually finishing.
The LGBT Community suffers mostly from the lack of a cohesive (and inspiring) strategy to win. There is room for anyone that wants to contribute – as equals. There have been a few notable cases of people suggesting that “inclusiveness” is the problem. While it may be something that needs additional work and consideration, I very honestly don’t care “who” comes up with a strategy because I believe that strategy will be our “leadership.” As a Community or Movement we don’t have anything to rally around and work together. It isn’t “who” is sitting at the table – it is what’s “on the table.” We need ideas and plans – ones that will lead to winning.
We know the goal, but we have no clear idea how to get there. No Map. No Plan. That must change. If you must complain, then complain about that, not about who is trying, contributing and doing their best.
I hope everyone and anyone that cares about our full equality will attend – It’s important.
– Andrew
This has been going on in Dallas and every other city in the U.S. for 40 years. You aren’t the first LGBT group to attempt to formulate a comprehensive plan for achieving equality. That will never happen until you have a majority of the people on the same page as regards healing the divisions in our community. One that immediately comes to mind is race relations within our community. If Mark Reed and Blake Wilkinson can’t manage a truce between themselves, how will a large number of LGBT activists accomplish the same task?
Still, I admire all of you for trying.
It sounds like about half of the people who have been participating in the dialogue will be on their way to D.C. for the march, which will ultimately end in the dick bars that thrive in the shadows of the Capitol. I won’t be going. I’ve marched on Washington and through the dick bars before. Those bar owners have got to be loving it every time someone announces a new LGBT march on D.C.
I won’t be going to the meeting in Dallas either since I now live on Cedar Creek Lake (a blessed 60 miles away from the big city). I won’t ever quit commenting on what I see and think, but I believe it’s time to turn it all over to the younger set. Hopefully, you can create more harmony within the LGBT community than my generation was able to ever do.
Me and my partner are planning on going to the march. It would be nice to have a pre-planning meeting so we can hit the ground running.
@ Tisha McDaniel,
Please read the original Reed / Wilkinson blog article again and you will see that the original proposal and intent of the meeting was to have a simple non-formal discussion at someone’s home in a safe atmosphere to allow commentors of that thread and anyone who wanted to come the chance to discuss issues pertaining to both that thread and the Dallas GLBT community at large……….
However, within a day this proposal has been transformed by one person and sensationalized in the media as this great “summit” for Dallas GLBT activism complete with a posh Melrose meeting room and “who’s who” attendance by the Dallas “Leadership” circles (typical corporate and political business model), a drastic departure from what was originally planned………….
While I am a strong advocate for inclusion of all, I am sorry to say that this new format is the perfect recipe for exclusive leadership / activist cliques to form and exert their influence while other voices and opinions get shoved to the side (as it almost always does in the Dallas circles).
Perhaps people are bitching, Tisha, because they are tired of the same status quo format of getting people together, or rather “select” people together.
I mean, can’t the Dallas GLBT community just once get together to discuss views without it turning into some political caucus or PAC ???
@GLBT I think part of the problem is that there are people, like yourself, who believe there is a group of “elite” activists. I believe that there are people who have more money and resources than others but it doesn’t mean that their work is more important than mine. There are people who get fancy awards and have their name in paper a gazillion times. You also have the teenager who witnesses a gay youth being bullied at school and decides to take a stand. That is activism too. I think we need to get pass the mentality of us vs them. Just imagine what we can do if could come together (whether it be in a posh hotel or someone’s apt WHO CARES) and start having these tough conversations.
You think that’s bad? Try to get a bunch of area Oak Lawn guys to bring a sandwich, a soda, and a blanket to a local area park for an afternoon picnic and you’ll be amazed how it turns into a screaming match over what kind of sandwich to bring, who’s anti-vegan, don’t you dare bring bug spray with DEET.
By they time it all irons out you turned it all into some kind of picnic committee requiring board approval to bring a folding chair instead of a blanket.
__________________________________
GLBT Realist Says:
October 2nd, 2009 at 9:48 am
Well gee, funny how the original intent and purpose of this little gathering quickly turned from a group of commentors getting together who were in disagreement and concerned about issues, to a full blown gay political “activists” coalition complete with a “game plan” strategy and media coverage……………..What’s next, corporate and political “sponsorship”.
GLBT Realist said: “Perhaps people are bitching, Tisha, because they are tired of the same status quo format of getting people together, or rather “select” people together.”
1. “People” are not bitching – you are.
2. I invited “everyone” that cares about our equality.
3. It is a “conversation for possibility.”
I rented a room at the Hotel to accommodate everyone. No Corporate sponsors. No Political Caucus or Pac. We enter the room “equal” and we leave the room more equal.
Many of us are very tired of the divisions in the Community that seem to come from comparing efforts within the community, as if it’s a competition. There is a lot to do. We don’t need to judge each others intents or demean anyone’s efforts. So, for everyone that wants to keep score or judge individual contributions, wait until after we have achieved our full equality. You can still do that little exercise, alone in the corner – while the rest of us are celebrating.
Wednesday 7 PM – Melrose/Warwick
@Realist –
Get a grip. The only one talking about having a “select” group is you – made all the more select by your own self-exclusion. My impression is: if an invitation, complete with date/time/location, is published where all can see, than anyone can come and all opinions and persons are being considered equally. You think the locale is too posh? Stop bitching and recommend a place large enough to hold a crowd, with the ability to control noise and atmosphere, and convenient to the gaybourhood. Hold a meeting in an apartment if you like, but how do you expect to reconcile that with your all-inclusive, no one gets left out attitude? Melrose sounds good to me. Plenty of room, comfortable, and we can get down to business, try to figure something out.
And why exactly do you want to “discuss issues pertaining to the Dallas GLBT community at large” without having a strategy for equality in mind? If you just want to have a nice chat about being gay in Dallas, go to a friend’s “safe” apartment, or go to a bar and talk to your friends. You don’t want to have a conversation if there’s a possibility that something will come of it? That there might be some kind of achievement?
I would like to have something more than a buzz to show for my time.
I would love to attend but I will be in DC preparing
for the march. I know Mark Reed will already
be in DC too. Let me know what happens!
Well now, I am already getting tuned out and bashed and there hasn’t even been a meeting yet……. How ironic that these above comments reflect the very type of bashing and close mindedness that this “summit” meeting claims to denounce.
So I suppose the question is if some of the commentors above are already going to berate people online in a forum because individuals have a different point of view or concerns than they do, then I highly doubt that they will be any different in person at this meeting………..food for thought.
And Andrew your statement of :
“I invited “everyone” that cares about our equality.”
isn’t quite true. According to your letter above to Tammye and John, you stated and I quote:
“I would like to invite DFW area activists and advocates to a Meeting next Thursday from 7-9 pm at La Madeleine on Lemmon Avenue.”
So Andrew you really didn’t invite “everyone” just activists and advocates……………….translated as separatism.
And besides, did everyone from the other thread come to the consensus as a community that the theme of this meeting was going to be a “conversation for possibility.” Didn’t think so. More like your doing……..
Good luck in “leading” this group. It appears that you are the head coordinator for it already anyway. Interested in hearing your “results”.
Have y’all given up on (or just not heard about) the North Texas LGBTQA Unity Coalition?
It’s been meeting up at the Resource Center once a month for the past few months and is in the start up stage.
It’s exciting. I’m an officer of UNT’s LGBTI org, Glad, and I and our president and other officers have attended a couple of meetings. Activist groups, HRC, Lambda Legal, Bi-Network, other university orgs like Glad, etc. had representatives there. And then there were people who weren’t affiliated with a particular org.
This is from their facebook:
“This is a place for the North Texan LGBTQA activists, advocates, and volunteers to chat online [meaning on the Facebook page], share ideas, network, arrange meetings [like they have been doing at the Resource Center], and generally be awesome. We are at the beginning of forming a coalition of LGBTQA groups in North Texas to promote unity and communication in our community.”
Go check them out. It’s free and open. Join their facebook group and get info about meetings and such.
Easy peasey. 🙂
https://www.facebook.com/home.php#/group.php?gid=93184042060&ref=ts
@Realist: You are perhaps the real problem here. The above letter from “Andrew” concludes by saying “Everyone is welcome to attend.” Of course there was a mention of “Activists and Advocates” because that was the topic of the original Article and how most people defined themselves.
So, you’re just looking for a fight or a disagreement. That’s not very helpful. You should stay home. At the very least we should all be open to the “hope” that we can contribute and be productive. I’m excited about this meeting – it seems it’s not the typical Dallas “pretentious” crowd and it isn’t the usual suspects. It seems like a fresh opportunity to have a meaningful conversation.
I’m going out tonight and I’ll be talking about it. If the only criteria is “everyone that cares about our equality” I think others will probably want to attend. I know we can do much better in Dallas and that’s why I’m going.
Frankly I think all of the leaders of these groups have big heads and need to learn that the movement is for equal rights and not about the big heads of Daniel, Blake and the folks at Fairness Fort Worth. Frankly I am tired of this. We need a LEADER we can count on.
So… You would not identify yourself as either an activist or an advocate. That’s fine, they can be limiting terms. But do you expect a guest list? A bouncer checking advocate/activist cards at the door? Can you picture yourself taking part in a conversation about activism and advocating, even with a stretch of the imagination? I’m sure you can if you were so actively reading a blog/comment thread based on different factions working for equality. If you want to nitpick to that extreme, I suppose that’s fine, but maybe it’s better that you stay home anyway. But I doubt anyone would try to turn you away.
And so… you don’t want to have a conversation about the possibility of full equality… because one person said it first? Inspiring.
Wish I could do the Wed. Meeting, it sounds like a good conversation, however I am locked into work for this date also. Please keep me posted n how it turns out!
OK everybody, let’s take a long, deep breath. It has been suggested that Wednesday at the Melrose might be best due to so many people flying off to D.C. on Thursday. Blake and I will accept Wednesday evening if that works for more people. Where ever we decide to meet let’s all check egos at the door and have an honest and respectful conversation. I still believe something good and productive could result. Though such a gathering might not produce any miracles at first, it could be a useful start. Don’t most of us want that? Yes, I agree with whoever said this shouldn’t be a “media event.” Everything should be “off the record”, too. Though my career has been in the media, I will join you as a member of the GLBT family just like all of you and my interest is as sincere and deep as everyone else. Believe me when I tell you that my activism does not always benefit my broadcast career. I don’t do it for that, anyway. Since Blake and I are each one of the “names” mentioned by others above we will gladly step back and accept the final organic outcome of this “discussion” to plan this gathering. OK, everybody, now what? Can we work this out and make it happen? Do most of us still believe this idea had some merit or was this all just empty talk?
rick vanderslice
Would you people *all* shut the hell up already!
Bottom Line… There’s a Meeting, There’s a Time, There’s a Place.. PERIOD
If you wanna make a different in the community then show your ass up!
If you don’t then do us a favor and stay the hell home and bitch to yourselves.
What the hell is the matter with all you people?? You’re nit picking the shit outta each other for not dotting their I’s or crossing their T’s.. Get off your superiority complex and get busy or get the hell of this blog.
Grown men acting like little children at recess in a school yard… My balls’s bigger than yours so nyeah!!
This isn’t a debate.. it’s not open to debate, it’s an invitation for people to show their pathetic ass up and get involved so if you want to walk in bullshit, then go down to COWTOWN but stop flinging it around here.
You’re all MEN so start acting like it instead of a bunch of asshole little boys throwing tantrums.
In the meantime, we don’t care what you *THINK* and we won’t care until you put your friggin keyboard down and show your ass up in person. GOT IT?? Otherwise you’re nothing but a bunch of useless bits and bytes on a wire causing the rest of us to waste our free time reading your drivel.
And don’t add your stinking comments to my message cuz I don’t give a crap about your negativity and attacks. Just shut up and show up or give up and mind your own damn business instead of telling others “what they should do or how they should behave”
Bunch of pathetic morons… And you have the nerve to call this a community?
Yeah, Rick! Well said. Best of luck to all involved in starting a “constructive” conversation.
Are we ALL not “equals”?
I’ll be there. I like the focus on creating a strategy and plans. I want equality in MY lifetime.
Act On Principles Blog:
https://www.actonprinciples.org/category/actions/texas/
We’re are expecting a good crowd – please join us.
I guess I’m speechless. Is this yet another “arm” of QueerLiberaction demanding immediate equality ? Are these people seriously THIS NAIVE about the world in which they inhabit ?
After 40 years, and 2 full generations working toward “full equality” for GLBT people – what makes THESE people think they have the answers ??? I’m sorry, I just don’t see it.
Change and Progress happen incrementally. Any student of history knows that. The Emancipation Proclamation didn’t just happen overnight – it took the Abolitionist movement in New England a full generation of activism. Even after they were legally freed, it was another 100 years before African-Americans successfully secured the right to vote !
Do these new “activists” really honestly and truly think that THEY are going to be able to pick up
the banner like in Delacroix’s painting of Liberty leading the People ? Come on.
I’m all for discussions – but I prefer discussing things with RATIONAL minded people.
I think I’m going to have to sit this one out and let them learn the hard way about REALITY.
Well, I like the original idea posted by Rick Vanderslice…….. But that’s just me. I have no interest in yet another meeting to form yet another strategy. Besides, whatever gets proposed is really only a PART of the overall strategy anyway. Which is exactly what those initiating the meeting are saying is wrong with the picture in the first place. Unless somehow there is the mindset that there is going to be a new national movement that spontaneously erupts in Dallas, I’m not particularly sure how that talk is more helpful than what we’ve all done so far. But hey, I’m all about conversation so more power to ya.
The reason I stick with my interest in Rick Vanderslice’s original proposal is that it actually seemed to be more of a solution to bringing all sides together in a sense of healing/creating bonds so that we can work more effectively as a community. Maybe I’m wrong about that assumption but thats what it seemed like to me.
Hey Rick, Never heard back from ya’ when I responded to your invitation the other night……….. Whats up……
Did you all know that straight allies visit websites like these? I live 1500 miles away, I’m 54 and I’ve watched the gay rights movement since I was 16. I’ve had gay friends since I was 16. I don’t know a single person in Dallas but I have one message for you.
Your opposition is galvanized with lots of money. You need to come together. Prop 8 passed in California – the liberal state. Get a grip on who your real opponents are. They are organized, rich, have “religion on their side”, fear on their side and a lot of right wing media and conservatives on their side. Stop fighting with each other. Get mad and demand your rights. Who gives a flying F*** whose names goes down in history? YOU are needed. Each of you. Wake up already.
It seems we need a bit of reminding of why we are marching and what we are fighting for – rather than all these reminders of our divisions. When we feel excluded, it’s time to include ourselves.
I’m marching for:
A 19 year old boy who sent me a message just a few weeks ago reading, “Why do I have to be gay. I just want to die.”
Candice Metzler, who lost her job because she was transitioning and wound up homeless because no one would hire her in spite of her vast experience.
I’m marching for the 2 young people murdered in the LGBT Center in Tel Aviv, 26 year old Nir Katz and 16 year old Liz Tarboushi.
I’m marching for: Melvin Whistlehunt, Tony Randolph Hunter, Steven Parris, Larry King, Duanna Johnson, Alexandre Peixe dos Santos, Craig Gee, Osvan Inacio dos Santos, Sean Wiliam Kennedy, Roberto Duncanson and Lateisha Green.
I’m marching for the Rainbow Lounge and the Atlanta Eagle.
I’m marching because: “If not me, than who, if not now than when.”
Every one of us should remember that, while we have much to divide us, we must continue to focus on fighting for equality.
This movement starts with our stories, our hope and our inspiration and we change people’s minds one by one by one… our greatest advantage over our opponents is that these things affect us in our daily lives. In a democracy, if you change the people you change the law.
Cerebral1 Said: “After 40 years, and 2 full generations working toward “full equality” for GLBT people – what makes THESE people think they have the answers ??? I’m sorry, I just don’t see it.”
You can’t see anything , if you don’t go.
What is painfully clear is that we don’t have a Plan. We need one.
Your ideas and experiences would be helpful. I hope you share.
Damien Duckett Said: “I have no interest in yet another meeting to form yet another strategy. Besides, whatever gets proposed is really only a PART of the overall strategy anyway.”
What exactly is the “overall strategy?” No LGBT groups has presented a plan to win our equality. That’s a big part of the problem – we don’t have a strategy. Or a Plan. We need them. I hope you agree to participate.
Equality is most easily attained through respect. While universal acceptance will never occur, the best thing that we can do is to become people worthy of respect—and by extension, equality.
Excluding lesbians and the transgendered from the following statement (for the sake of brevity, and because I am neither), I believe this will be difficult for gay men to achieve because they REFUSE to acknowledge what it is that other men respect most: self-assured masculinity. For right or wrong, cultural and social history proves this to be the case.
We have always been told that because we are men who love men, that we are not REAL men. And we’ve swallowed it hook, line, and sinker. We drape ourselves in pink, purse our lips, and act like little girls at a tea party. And then we wonder why we aren’t treated as equals. As long as this kind of behavior pervades the gay community, we will never be treated as equals to other men. We won’t have their respect, and we won’t have them on our side. Of course, there are always exceptions to this, but those people will never be in the majority.
None of the meetings, rallies, or support groups I have attended, none of the petitions I’ve signed, the letters I’ve written, or the money I’ve donated have done as much for the advancement of LGBT equality as a firm handshake and a dignified, masculine demeanor has done.
There is nothing inherent in male homosexuality that predisposes a man to be effeminate. It is a partially chosen/partially imposed affectation brought about by a poor masculine self-esteem in boys and men who still accept the notion that being gay makes us less than men.
Of course, the solution is not to culturally homogenize our selves through heteronormative behavior—such as getting married or adopting children. We don’t have to be just like heteros to be accepted by them. My argument is rather that we should cast off the effeminizing memes imposed upon us by a culture that rejected us in the first place—and understand that our collective acceptance of these self-ostracizing memes are part of our problem.
So have your little meeting, and enjoy the catfights and bickering that are sure to ensue. I know your intentions are good, and I’m sure it won’t be a complete waste of time. But it won’t be nearly as effective as it would if gay men could simply learn to grow a pair.
See Andrew this is where you are a little wet behind the ears in your vision for a way forward. Look at how we all disagree on the best way forward on this simple Internet blog….. Now multiply that by a thousand or more and you have an approximate estimation for the number off different opinions held by those around the country. And you think we can bring every body, or even a majority of the gays in this country behind a single strategy? How many people throughout our history have been under the same disallusion? Countless.
I stand behind my previous statement. And welcome a meeting geared mor towards healing the fisures that divide us in terms of the hostility.
Screw it… I might just sit there in total silence.. but I’m gonna plan on going. Even if I don’t engage, I can get a little entertainment from the pissy queens who do.
That’s assuming they’re not a bunch of cowards and have enough balls to put their keyboards down and show up!
Then again, if they don’t, then it will prove what a bunch of ninny losers they really are. Don’t have to be a rocket scientist to figure out that psychology.
So if you’re not coming, then don’t.. but we don’t give a crap why you’re not and it’s just more space for those who do. Another reason for you to put your keyboard down and move on.
Ta Ta to all the Pissy Queens who don’t come in advance, Buhhhh Buuuye, and don’t forget to change your anti-depression suppositories.
@Verity Manumit – Halla Freakin’ Luya Thanks so much for one of the best blogger messages I have read in a very long time!!
Each and every one of us has the masculine gene and in the animal world even if you don’t look at the animal’s crotch you know he has certain traits.
I could never understand why many of these men could allow themselves to have such an ugly self-identity that this begins to rub off on the people they come into contact with.
I don’t like my neighbor because he has a cute ass.. I like him because he’s got a great and generous heart and even though he sleeps with a woman it has nothing to do with our respect for one another as we rake each other’s leaves, share barbeques on the grill, or even have a night of wine testing/tasting.
In the animal world, the male has always been the guardian and protector and the female has been the passive material one. It’s rather hard for a man to have all the maternal instincts of a woman but there are some connect to it more than others.
Why so many gay men in the world try to “EMULATE” the female persona I have never come to understand as a gay man myself but rather than dishonor those kind of men, I try to do my best to be compassionate and ask lots of questions to try to understand better.
I think we do need this meeting but I also think that we need to do a little more focusing on closing our eyes to this diversity and trying to come together to do something that can benefit all of us living in the united states. Not just the gay people. .but *all* people..
How much money would be gained by the feds and the state if equality rights were changed? How much larger would our armed forces grow if DOMA and DADT are changed?
Would this benefit only gay people or would it benefit *all* people in the united states?
Would this cut down on hate crimes by youth adding strength to our nation?
Would this also affect adoptions and reduction of unwanted children in orphanages thereby eliminating extra government expenditures?
Sometimes the most important element of a puzzle is based on the smallest part.
@Damien, although we may disagree on many issues, I am in full agreement with you concerning this meeting business…………..
I am really disgusted at how a simple gathering proposal designed to get people together to mend fences and speak about REAL issues facing our local GLBT community, has turned into a grandiose, drumbeating, political equality “summit” on main street because of one overzelous political activist with media clout who appears to have an opportunistic agenda……… and let’s not mention the mudslinging and bashing above which has accompanied this.
Guess what folks, this infighting and bashing and its causes are EXACTLY the kinds of issues we need to be discussing with each other right now, NOT political activism ……………
Again, I am disgusted at how the Dallas GLBT community has turned into this huge cauldron of political agendas and corporate “strategies”………………
Damien Said: “And you think we can bring every body, or even a majority of the gays in this country behind a single strategy?”
I asked you what the “overall strategy” was, because you said there was one. There isn’t. If you believe there is, please share with us. Dismissing other ideas and efforts is not a strategy.
To suggest that the community would not rally around a single strategy has no basis in fact. We have never had a “strategy” or even a cohesive plan to obtain our equality. If you think we have, please share it with everyone.
Making real progress requires each of us to be painfully honest about our plight and the lack of an inspiring and workable strategy. People who “make a living” on behalf of gays and lesbians are not in a hurry to do anything. In fact, the longer it takes – the more money they make, why hurry? They don’t have any incentive. This is why they don’t have a strategy, either.
Despite this, our community contributes hundreds of millions each year and countless hours of time – with little to show for it. Unless we are willing to look at the past objectively and plan the future with the goal of “winning,” we will just keep doing what we’re doing and getting what we’re getting – very little.
So, Damien, you can act like you’re pleased with our current efforts/results and convinced that the community has a plan to win, but I know better. I suspect that most people know the same and that’s why they don’t participate. It’s not because “they don’t get along,” or “they don’t care,” but because they don’t see much chance of success. Some of us are willing to change that, instead of simply complaining or fighting. Some of us want to win.
Everyone that cares about LGBTQ Full Equality is invited to attend and contribute.
Wednesday, October 7th, 7 PM – Melrose (Warwick) Hotel, Oak Lawn, Dallas
Because of the “strategy” claim made by Andrew, I decided to search the Top 4 National LGBT organizations websites. I wanted to determine if these groups referenced any strategy to win our equality. Here are the results:
Human Rights Campaign (29 Years and +$300 Million)
There is NO strategy to obtain equality on their website. The only “strategy” HRC has is this:
“HRC’s strength is based on a winning strategy of building support among mainstream voters, reaching out to fair-minded officials, regardless of their party, and taking on extremists with every tool available.”
The above statement is really a Mission Statement and not a strategy to win. That would require “math.” It would be able to project a year when our achieving equality should be possible or even probable.
Other HRC-Strategy references are limited to “online fundraising strategy” and “field strategies for State Campaigns.” Nothing about winning and certainly no references to ‘when’ that might occur.
LAMBDA (36 Years and +$200 Million to date)
There is NO strategy to obtain equality on their website. They do have a Mission Statement:
“We pursue impact litigation, education and advocacy to make the case for equality in State and Federal Courts, the Supreme Court and in the court of public opinion.”
GLAAD (24 Years +$120 Million)
There is NO strategy to obtain equality on their website. There are a references to “media strategy” and “field strategy.”
NGLTF (36 Years and $240 million)
There is NO strategy to obtain equality on their website. They have a Mission Statement:
“The mission of the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force is to build the grassroots power of the lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) community. We do this by training activists, equipping state and local organizations with the skills needed to organize broad-based campaigns to defeat anti-LGBT referenda and advance pro-LGBT legislation, and building the organizational capacity of our movement.”
The last time they had a “strategy” meeting and invited all other LGBT groups… was in November, 1996. ALL of the above groups attended that meeting – 13 years ago.
I don’t have enough information to say that the LGBT Community “does not” have a strategy to win our equality, but I did think I would find it on the four sites above. I didn’t.
Maybe the problem is the lack of incentive for our professional LGBT Advocates. Maybe, because there isn’t a clear path to winning, we just don’t get very excited. I don’t know – but, it’s made me think. I suggest, humbly, that maybe it should make us ALL think.
As a Community we have spent $800 million on just the four groups above. What do we have to show for it? Not much. I’m not suggesting that any of the above efforts are not helpful. I just don’t see any type of cohesive strategy.
If we use the Vote on DOMA as a benchmark, the US Congress voted in 1996 and the “Yes” votes (against us) were 81%. The effort to repeal DOMA in 2009 (if it ever gets to a vote) would have “Yes” votes (for us) of less than 30%. That means, at least in the Congress, 70% of our elected officials are still against us. Sure, it’s moved some in our direction, credit Obama and the Democrats, but not enough to “win.” At this rate it will be anther 25-30 years.
So, I’m not sure there is a lot to celebrate or even be hopeful about. When I add that reality, to the lack of any strategy to win, I have two conclusions – we’re not making enough progress and I can’t see any finish line. Not in my lifetime. That sucks.
From the above comments, it looks like Damien and Realist want to schedule a “love-in” to heal wounds. Grow up. Nobody cares about your self-inflicted “hurt feelings.”
I’m not as cynical as you two – I think we should think and talk about our strategy for equality. It’s a lot more important than liking each other. I want to know WHEN we will have our EQUALITY and HOW we will get there. Exploring that would be very helpful.
Isn’t the point of all of this – Equality?!?! That’s E – Q – U – A – L – I – T – Y !!!
Personalities should not matter. Which generation you are part of doesn’t matter. (I was born in 1952)
Where or who the idea comes from – doesn’t matter. The greatest changes come from an initial idea – the change won’t happen if the idea isn’t shared.
I cannot be at this meeting because I live in california. Oh and by the way I am a Lesbian.
Please no more fighting – please find something postive to agree on – and get to work on Equality. Isn’t that what we are all about !
I have heard from many of you and look forward to meeting on Wednesday evening. I think there is a place for everyone in this very important conversation. Please continue to invite anyone and everyone that sincerely cares about our full equality.
Wednesday, October 7th from 7-9 pm at the Terrace Room at the Melrose Hotel (Warwick) Oak Lawn. My email: HonestAmbition@gmail.com
Please understand that you do not need any credentials or permission to attend. I have heard from one of the local groups that makes a living working on LGBT issues. They demanded credentials from myself and others – as if to say they would grant “permission” for this conversation. Perhaps, that sheds some light on part of the problem here in Dallas. I believe everyone, as equals, already has a place at the table. Nobody needs permission.
I suspect this demand would have had more meaning if I thought our community was nearing the finish-line or that any one of us could point to a winning strategy. We cannot. It is beyond arrogant for anyone to discount anyone’s efforts. There are no qualifications or credentials for anyone who has the desire and the energy to work towards our full equality.
I invited anyone and everyone who cares about our equality to participate. I did so casually, not even providing my last name – or anyones. Jack E. Jett wants to be Madelin Albright – cool. Come as you are or even someone else – that’s not important. What is important is that we figure out how to win. I am simply trying to facilitate an important conversation.
In the end, our equality will depend on those of us who are willing to put our community before ourselves and our own agendas and be willing to share, listen and explore possibility. I hope you will join the conversation.
Thank-you for your consideration.
– Andrew
m j gets it. I get it. I’ll be there.
We must figure out how to win – I’m tired of the supposed fight. We’re not winning. We are only surviving. I do not want acceptance or tolerance – I want equality. We start Wednesday night. I expect a group of people that want to win, not profit off of our struggle.
I am bringing three friends – bring yours, too. We need to create a game plan to win.
Forget it Andrew – people in Dallas don’t care.
You guys should get out and read this: https://www.towleroad.com/2009/10/activists-to-picket-obama-at-human-rights-campaign-dinner.html
It would appear that Queer Liberaction is going to make a media impact and get some attention from the masses.
If you people don’t get this RSS feed you should take the time to subscribe to it cuz it’s one of the best GLBT news sources going even better than the Advocate or the Washington Blade.
Hey guys.. just a quick note to say thanks for the meeting last night and to everyone that came. It was great to cover things that many of us may not have thought about and I look forward to another meeting with you all next week.
And to all the complainers who didn’t show.. No Worries. It left more Starbucks coffee for the rest of us to enjoy..
I guess maybe it goes to prove my previous comments about what happens when you ask the “community” to roll up their sleeves and participate and only a handful show up.
Hey, but it was a great meeting anyhow instead of the usual BS and Political butt kissing.
LGBT Equality: We Need A Plan.
Meeting #2 – Thursday, October 15th from 7pm – 9 pm
The Great Room at the iLume – 4123 Cedar Springs Rd., Oak Lawn, Dallas TX
Entrance on Knight Street (Across from B of A)
This past weekend demonstrated that as a community, we have gone beyond infighting and we actually protest each other’s efforts. Plus, the “LGBT-Rights Industry” does not have a strategy or plan for our equality – even though we donate hundreds of millions of dollars.
It’s broke. Let’s fix it.
ANYBODY that is committed to full equality for the LGBT community is invited to attend. This important conversation is intended to create a cohesive strategy and a unified effort to obtain our equality.
RSVP not required, just show up and bring your ideas.
tinyurl.com/LGBTequality