Dish on Dallas, and Ask a Drag Queen!
Hey, y’all! I’m Cassie Nova — The Mouth of the Rose Room, and Drag Queen Extraordinaire here with the first installment of my new feature keeping Dallas up-to-the-minute on all the fun (and dirt) in North Texas.
Before I begin, a disclaimer. Please do not get offended by anything this big scary man in a dress writes here — it’s all meant to be in good fun. But if I do offend you … you can kiss my padded ass. Keep in mind — tucking can make you crazy. It’s a scientific fact. If you’re not sure about drag queens, we are just like other gay guys, but it takes us less time to get ready to go out. Hashtag GayMenBePrimpin. Hashtag DragItOut. Hashtag IWokeUpLikeThis. Hmmmm …. I don’t think I know how to use hashtags.
First up, welcome our new feature Ask a Drag Queen. Here is a question we “girls” get all the time:
Dearest Cassie Nova: Where do you put “it” when you tuck? What do you use?
Well, I keep mine in the drawer next to the bed or in my locker backstage. Actually I lost my leg in the war, so I have had to train mine to bend like a knee and to wear heels.
This might not be true. The truth is, where we put “it” is pushed back. The hard part is how we keep it there after the push. Some girls use either duct tape or a clear, slightly stretchy tape you can get at Elliott’s Hardware on Denton Drive. Then you wrap it up like a Christmas present. Important advice for newbies: Make sure you have shaved your hair. OUCH! I learned that the hard way years ago. Some queens, like myself, wear five pairs of tights to keep it hidden and to smooth over my pads. Still, for some of the gals that wear pasties …It’s magic.
Here’s another common question:
Dearest Cassie Nova: How did you get your start in drag?
Picture it — Dallas. 1993. I was less than a week away from turning 21. Young, slightly effeminate with a full eyebrow and nelly shoulder-length bob of full hair. I was out and proud and wanted the world to know it. I was also the president of a group based out of the Dallas Gay and Lesbian Alliance called G.L.Y.A. Gay and Lesbian Young Adults.
Well, the D.G.L.A. decided to have a President’s Day fundraiser and have the presidents of the different organizations put on a show at the fabulous Village Station (now, of course, S4). I thought, “Oh, crap!” I did not want to do drag. I was a young gay activist and kinda anti-drag. See, I hadn’t yet realized the power of wig. But after a little coaxing from my group, and a lesbian’s old prom dress, I gave in. Thus was Cassie Nova born.
That night, I performed Julie Brown’s “The Homecoming Queen’s Got a Gun” and was showered with money and accolades. It was awesome. After our fundraiser was over, I went upstairs to the Rose Room and entered the talent show hosted by the fabulously bitchy Donna Day. And I won! I had the feeling I had changed my life. I realized I had been preparing to be a drag queen my whole life — every cassette I owned was a female singer (Madonna, Stacy Q, Debbie Gibson, Taylor Dayne). I had been performing drag shows in my bedroom my whole life, minus the wigs and dresses.
My career snowballed after that. I entered every talent night I could and won almost every time. I learned and adapted fast. Shortly after I was asked to be part of a show called New Kids: The Next Generation. Now, 20-plus years later, I may not be a new kid but the Rose Room is still the place that gives me that awesome feeling.
How about a little Dallas drag gossip? What rising star was recently thrown out of a store on Harry Hines for allegedly stealing a belt the last time she was there? Here is a hint: It rhymes with Stefani Mikals. If you have ever been to those shops, you know they stalk their customers like a crazy ex. I guess they think all nelly boys look alike. Well the feeling is mutual. Bong!! Oh, and if anybody knows the whereabouts of Jenna Skyy’s blow dryer, please contact me. I’m talking to you, Stef!!!
Speaking of Jenna Skyy, congratulations to her for winning Miss Gay USofA. We are all very proud of you! Raise the roof! Literally … that crown is huge.
This Sunday is Father’s Day. So, if you are an actual father or just someone’s “daddy,” I hope you guys have a great day. Spend time with your family, whether they are blood or chosen. If you are lucky enough to actually have a great relationship with your dad, let him know how awesome and rare that is in our community. Cheers to all the loving and accepting pops out there. This mimosa is for you!
If you have a question and want to suggest for Ask a Drag Queen, or just have some juicy gossip to share, email it to AskCassieNova@gmail.com.
This article appeared in the Dallas Voice print edition June 6, 2014.
