A Word from Mother of Drag’uns

Hello. I think enough time has passed that I can openly speak of Game of Thrones. Caution — spoilers ahead. First, I want to vent to all you folks that had to let the world know that you never watched a single episode of Got (that’s nerd code for Game of Thrones, in case you are slow). Anyhoo, we get it: you never watched it; you don’t care. Your ass probably couldn’t afford cable anyway. Just kiddin’. I’m actually jealous of the folks who never watched the show because, if you choose, you can have the joy that we all shared in watching such a phenomenal story unfold without the misery of waiting for the next season.

Got is the perfect example of “It’s not the destination, it’s the journey.”

Many people did not like the way the series ended, but, getting there was one of the best rides of my life. The show was brilliant. The last two episodes left me wanting more, but I have come to peace with the ending provided, however rushed it felt. I will say that I am going to start the books soon so that I can experience the ending the way that good ol’ George R.R. Martin wanted. If he ever finishes writing the damn things.

I know we all wanted more of a Joffrey death when Cersei finally got what she deserved, but let’s remember: Though technically she was killed by falling rocks, those rocks only fell because of Daenerys going a little bit batshit crazy after losing many of those close to her and being denied some of that Jon Snow dick. Apparently knowing you did your aunt is a big turn off in the North. I will say that Khaleesi will always be one of my favorite characters. I just hate that in the end, a couple of men had to write her as just another pissed-off woman gone mad. If they only had a Snickers.

Arya Stark will forever be my hero. Where else but in the Game of Thrones world could you root for a child to kill people? But every time she killed someone, I cheered. I was physically sick watching some of those episodes when we didn’t know if she was going to be OK. I loved her ending and would love to know what lies west of Westeros for her.

I would follow her anywhere.

Tyrion, Sansa, Theon, Brienne, Tormund and so many more… I feel kinda heartbroken. I’m going to miss them. I know it sounds corny, but when I get invested into something as much as I was into Got, there will be a mourning period. Some of you will understand, and others will give this an eyeroll, but I will always be a Game of Thrones fan and don’t care who knows it. I can’t freakin’ wait for the prequels, spinoffs or whatever is to come. GOT4LYF bitchez!!!

And now a question from the audience…

Dear Cassie, After attending a show in the Rose Room last night, I have a question about etiquette on the part of the audience. What’s the proper way to tip? We usually sit next to the stage. When we tip, we reach up to hand the bills to the performer. I’m never sure if we should stand up or not, because I don’t want to block the view of anyone sitting behind us.

For the people sitting farther out in the audience, do you prefer them to come up to the stage and line up to tip you, or would you rather go out to them?

What about the people who tease you? Who act like they expect you to do something extra special to earn that dollar?

You wrote about the drunk who tried to snatch your wig, so after last night, I’m curious about the drunks. Obviously they aren’t supposed to go up onstage while you’re performing, but when you’re down on the floor, how do you feel about them coming up to you like you’re their best friend and trying to be a part of your performance? (Or the guy standing up and dancing so obnoxiously that he’s taking attention away from you?)

Sorry, I know that’s a lot of questions. They all just came to mind while watching y’all last night. Thanks for all you do. Signed, Mark.

Hello Mark, Great questions, and you know, I have some strong views on this subject. The short answer to what is the proper way to tip is, “with respect.” I honestly don’t care if you bring it to me, or if I need to sashay over to get it from you. It gives us a chance to be seen in all of our 360-degree loveliness. Yes, it does annoy the hell out of us when they try to interact too much with us while we are performing. On one hand, how dare I complain about how someone gives me their hard-earned cash? But on the other hand, my performance isn’t about you are your money. I see tipping as a form of respect for what the artist is doing and when someone makes their tipping interfere with the performance, it’s annoying. It’s like thank you or your money, but bitch, please!

We all absolutely hate it when someone puts money in their mouth and expects us to take it with ours. Nope! Never gonna happen. Do you know how nasty our currency can be? The plague, Captain Tripp’s Super Flu… God knows what we could catch from your filth-, fecal and cocaine crusted dollar bill.

As far as the teasers, dancers and people that just stand in the way, it all comes down to home training, and many of these people have none For many — and I was very guilty of this in my youth, tipping is a strained attempt to be seen and just feel a little of what it is like to be onstage. For those few seconds, it’s a way for someone to feel included. If I would have never found my voice as Cassie Nova, I might still be that annoying person tipping with the inner thought of, “Someone please notice me; I have value.” I get that person… I was that person. But like the divas that put me in my place and told me to sit the fuck down, I try to point it out to those that don’t even realize what they are doing.

Truth is, there will always be clueless people being disrespectful while tipping. The only thing I can change is how I handle the situation. Luckily, 95 percent of the time, we have the best audiences in the world. So thank you to all the well-behaved, respectful tippers out there. We see you, and you are appreciated. We will be forever grateful for every tip we ever receive. Thank you! Remember to always love more, bitch less and be fabulous! XOXO, Cassie Nova Texasborn… Mother of Dogs… Wearer of pads… Of the House DRAGarian!

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