Everyone likes a good rear-end, and these rides offer sexy styling coming and going
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| You might not expect a hot piece of tail from Lincoln, but the MKT offers just that. |
There is much my partner and I disagree about, but we both covet the perfect hot ass. Small and tight, or muscled with the perfect bubble, it is all about the rear.
The same is true with cars. One’s grille is a conversation starter, but the view and utility in back seals the deal.
These crossovers look hot and service their owners with pleasure.
Nissan Cube: Oddly shaped, but hot
Some bums are oddly shaped, but amazingly hot. Nissan endowed the Cube with an asymmetrical wrap-around window that gives the car’s tail something worth staring at. A side-hinged hatch opens completely to ram in all you survey. Its tall, boxy profile is rounded, rippled and toned in ways that make you want to bounce a quarter off its smooth surface.
Cube’s interior is the Zen of compact cars. Automatic air keeps the available gardenlike shag dash topper at the perfect temperature. Rockford Fosgate audio with subwoofer, XM Satellite Radio and iPod jack perk up your ears. To create the right mood for all you do, there’s a 20-color interior illumination kit.
Access to this rolling temple is provided by the Nissan Intelligent Key that allows automatic entry and push button starting. Bluetooth leaves hands free for important tasks during cell calls.
Stirring this groove is a 1.8-liter four-cylinder engine that generates 122 horses, connected to the front wheels through either a six-speed manual or continuously-variable (CVT) transmission. Fuel economy is rated 28/30-MPG city/hwy.
Four-wheel anti-lock brakes, stability control and electronic brake force distribution keep the Cube’s cute rump perked and poised.
Like Scion’s xB, the Cube starts at a reasonable price, but can be optioned to the roof with glitz and glamour. Base models start at $13,990 ($15,690 with CVT), but rise to $19,370 for the tricked Krom edition. No matter which one you choose, you’ll drive an economically functional lump of bump.
Audi Q5: Attached to great legs
Auto Union racers gave Mercedes Silver Arrows a solid thumping on racing circuits during the late 1930s. Between 1935 and 1937, Auto Union cars won 25 races. A rivalry between the two great German marques continues to this day under the banner better known as Audi.
Born from a legacy of successful racecars, the Q5 is one of the most competent sprinters among crossovers. A 270-HP, 3.2-liter V6 connected to Audi’s Quattro AWD system motivates its A4-based platform. Fuel economy is rated 18/23-MPG city/hwy, and it runs to 60 mph from naught roll up in a scant 6.7 seconds. Up to 4,400-lb trailers can be towed, allowing the Q5 to move large, fun, toys.
No dumb athlete, the Q5 can get you almost anything with its voice-activated navigation system. Say, "I’m hungry," "I need gas" or "I need coffee" and the car summons directions. (I’m not sure what happens if you say, "I’ve had too much coffee" or "I have gas.") On the way, everybody will enjoy heated/cooled cupholders, Bluetooth and a Bang & Olufsen 505-watt 14-speaker audio system.
As expected from Audi, the Q5 is exquisitely styled inside with the finest materials.
From the aggressive front, wagon side profile, or LED lights, the Q5 is clearly from a long legacy of thrashing competitors.
Just as in the ’30s, all rivals, including Mercedes, BMW and Cadillac, are likely to see is this Audi’s firm ass disappearing around the next curve. You’ll pay at least $37,350 to ride inside.
Lincoln MKT: Classic gentleman
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| The Nissan Cube’s cute but unusual rump will no doubt keep heads turning. |
Despite a brand that brings thoughts of Viagra, there is no old man fanny here. This Lincoln is the classic gentleman with refinement and pedigree, as well as a new age limo interior. All will surely admire whatever emerges from the rear of this big crossover.
People will stare when they see your historically inspired "bow wake" grille, ledged shoulders and full-width taillamps. Inside, three rows of luxury accommodations are upholstered in fine leather under an optional Power Panoramic Vista Roof.
Six-place editions chill with a second row refrigerator – perfect for watching dual 7" DVD screens with THX II 5.1 surround audio.
There are also deep layers of protection that include radar cruise control, blind spot detection and reverse cameras that work with Active Park Assist to coach drivers into parallel parking spaces. Vehicles equipped with Adaptive Cruise come with a collision warning system that detects slower moving traffic ahead, warns the driver on a heads-up display, then prepares for an emergency stop.
What really ambles the MKT’s elegance down the road is its standard 268-HP 3.7-liter V6 engine with optional all-wheel-drive. Front-drive models achieve 17/23-MPG city/hwy. To really stir game, choose the twin-turbo "EcoBoost" 3.5-liter V6 that generates 355 horses.
Like a gentleman who knows how to dress with classic fashion while projecting a contemporary flair, the Lincoln MKT has a lot to teach novices. Take a good look at the MKT’s round rump because it will become a familiar sight in the coming years. Prices start at $44,200.
This article appeared in the Dallas Voice print edition November 06, 2009.