Even in death, Whitney creates buzz
While I was in Fort Lauderdale, John Travolta was chatting up a stranger in a Planet Fitness in Ocala, Fla. At 3 a.m., Justin Jones thought he’d work out in an empty gym when a familiar-looking bald man approached him (coincidentally, I met Kirby in kind of a gym). “Hi, I’m John,” said the hairpiece-free Travolta. He then bombarded the guy with a barrage of questions: are you married, do you have kids, what do you do for fun. Jones later told The Enquirer (in exchange for payment, I’m sure), “I understood what was happening when it was happening — it was in his body language. It didn’t make me uncomfortable, but I noticed it.”
Last week saw the debut of the long-awaited Whitney Houston biopic. Considering it followed up Lifetime’s previous biopics on Anna Nicole Smith and Brittany Murphy, I can’t say the results were disastrous. On the positive side, we got to enjoy the stellar vocals of Deborah Cox, doing her best Whitney impersonation (and purposely suppressing her trademark soul). The person getting the brunt of the criticism is Angela Bassett, who was making her directorial debut. Most of the barbs came from the Houston family. Matriarch Cissy all but issued a fatwa on Angela, but Whitney’s daughter Bobbi Kristina went further. You see, BK wasn’t pissed the film was made. Oh, no. She was pissed she wasn’t in it! Believe it or not, Whitney’s only child wanted to be cast as the lead. Hmmm, let’s look at the reasons why she wasn’t. First, I don’t believe she can act. Second, she would be doing love scenes with the guy playing her dad. And third, she looks nothing like Whitney. Perhaps she would have been more successful if she’d gone after the role of Bobby Brown!
Bobbi Kristina went public with her complaints. While the film was in production, she Tweeted, “Ha MsAng ‘bassketcase’ has such a damn nerve. My lord, at least the world doesn’t mistake me for the wrong sex… she has #XtraEequipment.” She then added, “When I win my first Grammy or Oscar, *Shrugs* hmm whichever comes1st, I’ll be sure 2shout URname out b-tch! hah UrTestResults = MALE. Lmao.” I’m not sure where to start dissecting this: the grievances, the grammar or the grandiosity. It is fascinating that LaPrincia’s sister muses on whether she’ll win a Grammy or an Oscar first while bashing someone who actually has been nominated for an Oscar!
Nine million years ago, Joan Rivers gave me a signed copy of her will “for safe keeping.” Alas, this is an old draft that is completely invalid (but I bet worth a small fortune on eBay). I thought about this while reading her last will and testament and discovering that she was as generous in death as she was in life. A portion of Auntie Joan’s estimated $150 million estate is to be donated to some of her favorite charities, including God’s Love We Deliver and Guide Dogs for the Blind. Bequeaths were also made to a handful of relatives (her grandson Cooper and her sister’s two kids), her assistants and some close friends. The rest goes to daughter Melissa.
Jared Leto recently Tweeted a mega-hot selfie wearing only tights and a fanny pack. Turns out, Leto is selling the accessory, which he calls a “hip pack” (a term I’m sure he picked up from his Dallas Buyers Club co-star Matthew McConaughey, who called it that when he was snapped wearing one). You may buy Jared’s wares at JaredLetoMerch.com.
Derek Hough has left Dancing with the Stars to try something really different: “I am ecstatic that I’ll be able to extend my passion for performing to the Great Stage of Radio City Music Hall in New York Spring Spectacular.” Yes, you read correctly: Hough is going to become a Rockette. He’s certainly got the gams for it. Derek may have left DWTS, but we still have Julianne at the judges’ table. And she had a big announcement of her own. Fox will be joining the TV musical craze with a live performance of Grease. And playing Sandy will be Hough (Julianne, not Derek), while Rizzo will be portrayed by Vanessa Hudgens. Since Grease: Live isn’t taking place until Jan. 31, 2016, it continues the longstanding Fox tradition of casting the roles of high school students with people a generation older. (Glee, anyone?)
This week’s Ask Billy question comes from Barry in Atlanta: “I loved the photo of you and the Carver twins — they are so hot on Teen Wolf. But what is this three-way you mentioned? Is that in a movie? A gay three-way?”
Yes, indeed. I Am Michael is about Michael Glatze, who worked at XY magazine, founded YGA and was a gay rights activist. Eventually, he became a proponent of conversion therapy and an outspoken ex-gay. James Franco is playing Glatze while the role of his boyfriend is being played by Zachary Quinto. According to sources who saw the flick at Sundance, Franco meets Charlie Carver in a club and hits on him. When Carver asks about his boyfriend, Franco says, “He’d like you, too.” This leads to a very hot sex scene. How hot? We’re told there’s lots of kissing (as evident above), skin and, at the very least, asses.
When Luke Perry could be cast as Danny Zuko in Grease: Live, it’s definitely time to end yet another column. If you’ve got a question for me, send it along and I promise to get back to you before the Rockettes realize they hired the wrong Hough!
So, until next time, remember one man’s filth is another man’s bible.Until next time, remember: One man’s filth is another man’s bible.
Have a question for Billy? Send an email to him at Billy@BillyMasters.com.
This article appeared in the Dallas Voice print edition January 30, 2015.